So relatable! Funny, I was just talking about this topic last night in response to something that happened on a Friend’s rerun. 😂Add this pet peeve- when well-meaning people tell you “I just want you to really think about this...” when you share a big decision you’ve clearly already made. As if you haven’t thought about it ad nauseam?!
In the same vane, nagging or guilt tripping will 100% of the time result in me, at minimum, delaying the intended action; at worst, never doing it - despite me knowing it’s in my best interest to do so. It’s a giant middle finger back at the instigator and definitely a result of how I was parented.
The other day we were in Uncle Giuseppes to pick up something to bring to someone's house and Adam said "don't go crazy". I said, "Whatttttt? Don't tell me that - I picked two things, I am not going crazy." And he laughed and jokingly said "calm down" - he was trying to 'shake my chains' and it worked!! My blood was boiling (and he was just kidding)!!
My distaste for people telling me what to do is deeply grounded from having had a mother who spent the first 18 yrs of my life constantly telling me what to do and backing it up with force for the first 13. After spending an additional 4yrs in the military I ended my indoctrination phase and began to try to answer that question for myself.
What to do.... next,,, in this situation,,,, in my life,,, now There are a lot of answers.
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You may have heard this saying that has become a mantra for me;
"opinions are like assholes, everybody's got one and they all stink"
Most people find that at least marginally offensive but I think it states the literal and metaphoric truth.
All that said, I will at least listen for a while.
I now may never wave anyone again at a 4 way stop, will unleash my inner-NJ and just go. Good article Liz.
I know there are times when the little wave is needed, but still ... :-)
So relatable! Funny, I was just talking about this topic last night in response to something that happened on a Friend’s rerun. 😂Add this pet peeve- when well-meaning people tell you “I just want you to really think about this...” when you share a big decision you’ve clearly already made. As if you haven’t thought about it ad nauseam?!
Yes so frustrating! What good is saying that AFTER the decision has been made!
In the same vane, nagging or guilt tripping will 100% of the time result in me, at minimum, delaying the intended action; at worst, never doing it - despite me knowing it’s in my best interest to do so. It’s a giant middle finger back at the instigator and definitely a result of how I was parented.
The other day we were in Uncle Giuseppes to pick up something to bring to someone's house and Adam said "don't go crazy". I said, "Whatttttt? Don't tell me that - I picked two things, I am not going crazy." And he laughed and jokingly said "calm down" - he was trying to 'shake my chains' and it worked!! My blood was boiling (and he was just kidding)!!
Haha! Don't they know that saying "calm down" is like throwing gasoline on a fire?
I agree it's so annoying (and dangerous!). Great piece, Liz!
Great piece. Def relate - My absolute pet peeve is being told not to feel what I feel. The word "should" shakes my chains too. Thanks Liz
"Shakes my chains" - love that expression!
My distaste for people telling me what to do is deeply grounded from having had a mother who spent the first 18 yrs of my life constantly telling me what to do and backing it up with force for the first 13. After spending an additional 4yrs in the military I ended my indoctrination phase and began to try to answer that question for myself.
What to do.... next,,, in this situation,,,, in my life,,, now There are a lot of answers.
(enlarge photo icon)
You may have heard this saying that has become a mantra for me;
"opinions are like assholes, everybody's got one and they all stink"
Most people find that at least marginally offensive but I think it states the literal and metaphoric truth.
All that said, I will at least listen for a while.
That's a good one for sure!